Cultural differences, here we go again. A lot has already been said about this topic. We all know we can learn from someone of another culture because he/she can provide us with different perspectives and new insights. Sometimes understanding and communication is difficult because we’re just oblivious of certain things. As unaware as the middle-age man in shorts and white socks, carrying a huge-ass DSLR and fanny pack, who gets off from the upper deck of the hop-on hop-off bus to get mass-produced souvenirs with a hand-made label on them. Cultural understanding is important. I believe it’s true but I’ve taken this with a grain of salt. At the end of the day, we’re still human, no matter what cloth you put on your head or spices you sprinkle on your food. Maybe being mainly influenced and surrounded by a Western culture is a bit too salty for me. After all this salt, I barely know the taste of sweet, sour, bitter and umami, even with some travelling and mixing with an international crowd on my taste buds.
It would have been a much sweeter ride if I was aware of some cultural tendencies of this girl and “her kind”. Looking back at other encounters with the same background, it makes sense now. I just did some online research as well. These “69 Dos and Don’ts of dating a [enter country or ethnicity] girl” are resourceful. I’ve should have known… But here’s the thing. Girl X is from country A, therefore I need to read chapter eleven from “The guide to cross-cultural dating for dummies”. Getting this prepared seems a bit dishonest to me, almost manipulative. What am I trying to achieve here by doing that? It would also open doors for stereotypes and biases. On the other hand, it’s a bit foolish to disregard all your past experiences and that of others just because you want to show up with a clean slate, or believe so.
I don’t particularly enjoy cultural differences while dating. It’s distracting and hindering the mating process itself. While for the girl it might be a part of her cultural courtship DNA, for me it can be a sign of playing games and time-wasting. While something for me is no big deal, can be a dealbreaker for her. These differences can be interesting to discuss during a dinner party but it doesn’t really help to connect on an emotional level. I believe culture is just another layer we have to scratch off to get to someone’s personality. Of course, a person’s individuality is influenced by and intertwined with his/her background. If someone is so much defined by his/her culture than I’d just have to believe the stereotypes and generalisations. Easy peasy lemon squeezy! But who wants that. I find the exceptions more interesting than the rule.
Talking about exceptions or maybe the lack of them. It struck me how clearly divided the dating market is here. My feeling is that there’s a segregation based on looks (ethnicity) and wallet (economical status). While this is pretty much universal, it’s magnified, almost exaggerated in Dubai. I had talks with different people and many of them had crystal clear preferences for dating or not dating a particular group. A strange, bitter taste…
I know you’re all dying to know what boba flavour we took. Well, we had unsweetened black and oolong milk tea. This boba shop also puts pudding in their bubble teas which is weird but okay.
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