I raise my glass to no one in particular. I celebrate my existence with gin and tonic for no reason. I’m happy because today is, well, just today. It’s weird to say for a wannabe overachiever. Shouldn’t there always be a clear goal and purpose in mind? Thus making the most efficient and effective use of my time and energy.
Blame it on age, or maybe circumstances. Irrational nuance with a philosophical touch overtake the wild flames of maximum productivity. The black becomes less black and the white less white. Like Michael Jackson and sneakers during a night out. Fifty shades.
I know, she knows, we both know that whatever happens, ultimately, our journey leads to nowhere. We talked for weeks about everything and nothing. Essentially meaningless banter and wit. But we shared just enough whereabouts and practicalities to create a mutual understanding. A silent agreement on our non-existing future together included.
It’s sad and beautiful at the same time. But most of all, it’s liberating, for me at least. There’s nothing to hold back, there’s nothing to lose. Anything can happen, anything is fine. Thoughts and statements flow freely in a serenade of love and romance, for the sake of love and romance. An uninterrupted chains of words from the selfish heart, bypassing the empathetic brain. Pure improvisation from the amateuristic artist. The calculated scientist losing grip of the metre and rhyme scheme of the limerick. Who still writes that kind of poem these days anyway…
I have never been a jealous or needy type. But that maybe stems from a psychological trench position whereas this kind of freedom comes from a place of abundance, real abundance. There’s me in the moment, with no need to control, impress or force anything. It doesn’t matter if expectations, if any, are met. There’s this date and there’s tomorrow.
Enjoy it while it lasts.
I know you’re all dying to know which ice cream flavours we tasted. Well, there was a female with vanilla and chocolate, and a handsome man with banana and chocolate.
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