I found the girl I met pretty mature for her age. It helps if you were born in one country, grew up in another one and studied abroad in two more. I was happy to converse with her, hear her stories and learn from her perspectives. So I discovered that during Arab weddings males and females are separated, and things can get pretty next-level wild and intoxicated when the doors are closed. Did somebody say body shots and dancing on tables? All age groups included. Indian weddings are multi-day affairs and by day two or three, people walk around with IV fluid drips in their arms to recover. Talk about crazyness!
Age is just a number I always say but I also experienced the undeniable biological clock of women and the expectations that come with it when it’s ticking louder. I agree that there are times when you have to be a real man and face the problem head on. But I prefer to man up later in this case and turn down my preferred maximum age limit with a couple of notches #pragmatism101 When I just became a corporate slave, I didn’t want to date student babes. There was, as the younger version of myself speculated, “a difference in rhythm of life and available leisure time which inevitably would result in incompatible energy levels and schedules“. The current version, you could say wiser and even more sexy, of myself would add that there’s also a difference in responsiblities (yes, real ones) and pressures to handle.
Over the course of this dating journey, I figured that even with all the life experience some girls are still a bit naive when it comes to dating. Someone can have been to many places, tried many foods or been on many adventures but still don’t know how to behave at the table of seduction. In a free world, of course everyone does what he or she pleases. However, there are certain manners that make it more pleasant for everyone. Some people see it as an opportunity to educate and teach how it’s done. I prefer to enjoy the 5-course meal without worrying what cutlery to use or getting frustrated by loud chewing.
The reason why I now screen for this type of “dating maturity” is that I don’t want to deal with all the insecurities and objections. No, I don’t want to date a fearless girl who always agrees with me. I’m currently just a bit tired of explaining that dating has more colours than only black and white. It’s like telling less well-travelled people about foreign countries you visited. No matter how hard you try, they will keep insisting on the stereotypes they believe in “that place is so dangerous and people get robbed all the time” “yeah, they eat dog meat every day” “people get beaten up because they are not a moozlim” Often the only substitute is, seeing is believing, experiencing it yourself.
Usually dating is a big thing for newbies and it clearly shows in their behaviour. The Disney beliefs and fairytale logic is probably a bad combination with someone who’s hobby is documenting real life dating experiences. Admittedly my (changing) perspectives are not the truth and sometimes, to put it mildly, highly contestable. Long story short, I prefer girls who have been out dating over the ones who just swipe or ask silly questions like “what are you looking for” or say things like “I prefer to get to know you better before meeting” and then continue to send a couple of thousands of text messages until eternity.
For me the more experienced, the better. These girls understand that dating is not perfect and sometimes it gets messy. They are okay with some type of mess, with other types, it’s ciao forever. They can spot the bullshit from miles away as they have been there before and seen it all. They know what they want and have realistic expectations. Actually their expectations are so low now that someone who has a quite honest and witty perspective on modern dating easily stands out…
I know you’re all dying to know what flavour the shisha was. Well, it was guava. Very citrusy, a bit sour but definitely fresh.
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